In a universe populated by gods, semi-gods and fearsome warriors where the prey is scarce (due to over-hunting), it is imperative to establish a natural pecking order among the predators/masters.
Who is the strongest and fastest pussy that can claim the lion's share? Who is the scavenger that can only hope for some left-over morsels? 

In order to establish such order, OF is proud to present the first OF Masters Games, with a short list of events:

- a steeplechase race where the masters will have to jump over piles of discarded Amazon wishlist boxes and puddles filled directly from the OF dungeon's sewage system

- a chariots race (for stable owners only). The chariots will be powered by the owned slaves. Masters with only one slave will compete on a tandem (the slave will be doing the pedalling, obvs!)

- toss the fag. Based on the Highland Games' "caber tossing" event. No further explanation needed.

- pissing contest, with the following categories: distance / volume/ strength
- piñata bashing: blindfolded Masters will compete in smashing piñatas full of OF tips (and probably each other's skulls, inadvertently of course)

Please apply NOW sending a non-refundable deposit of 10,000 tips to cynic, the Games' secretary.  Places are limited. Send your deposit NOW to avoid disappointment.

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