For a while now I've been thinking of leaving this site. For a while now I've felt criticised and judged and that's never comfortable. I get it. This is a goldfish bowl and space is tight in goldfish bowls, especially with those dodgy windmills and too much plankton. So, I was thinking of leaving but then a little reflection kicked in.

I joined this site almost 3 years ago to encounter a Dom, to serve a Master and I was lucky enough to meet him. Sadly it didn't work as we would have hoped, sometimes it doesn't work but I have no regrets, only happy memories. Service isn't easy, it's complicated because there are often agendas, sometimes uncertainties and online life is never easy. Throw in the demands of the heart, hopes, fears and the expectations of a busy life and then long-term service is made almost impossible.

Some make it. Lucky them.

I came here to find a Dom and Master, but I also came here to meet friends, to speak with like-minded men, to engage, to smile, to laugh, fundamentally to find companionship. Life is often lonely and we must all do what we can to keep the loneliness at bay. I take responsibility for my words and actions and I've apologised often. I've behaved poorly. I've admonished myself and begged for forgiveness. I've hurt good men, both sub and Dom and I've hurt myself far more.

Please, time is painfully short and this place should be full of possibility and hope. I'm often foolish but I have no axe to grind and no judgements to make. If you find happiness and contentment, even for a moment, then I'll celebrate with you. It's a difficult world so I beg you, let's all take a breath and be kind to each other.

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