Are all gay men faggots? Yes…depending on who you are talking to. A homophobe from the 90s would consider any male who has sex with other males to be a faggot…because they are gay. As a “real world” slur, it’s straightforward: gay men are faggots.

The role of “faggot” in the BDSM world is different. Whereas both gay men and faggots both enjoy having sex with men, that’s the end of the overlap.

Although the definition changes from person to person, the most prevalent feature about a faggot specifically is that it revels in dehumanization, degradation and humiliation. Degradation is at the core of the faggot’s sexuality. That could manifest itself in being a slut, getting fucked by hundreds of anonymous men, identifying as “just a hole.” It could manifest itself in being bred publicly so others see how depraved and pathetic you are. They could have one of those exposure kinks where it’s made public that they like to crossdress and suck cock on a virtual ID. It could be FinDom, getting off on sending money to strangers or Doms they’ve met.

If I had to give a dictionary-style definition, a faggot is a submissive, non-reciprocal-loving male whose sexuality is motivated by degradation, verbal exploit, humiliation and dehumanization, who sees “real men” as superior to him, who worships the ideals of masculinity and manhood and who enjoys sexually, meniall, and/or financially service men