I’ve seen so many new dom profiles or blogs recently that set out their desire for dedicated, loyal finsubs… outlining their immediate expectations : send when told, always obey , total dedication etc etc . Yet something I rarely see in these profiles is how they plan to get the sub into that mindset at all , let alone straight away. 

There is so much more to a findom relationship than a photograph and some words about how dominant you are. There are 800 ‘Doms’ on the site, but only some demonstrate that they have the ability to adapt and work with a sub to build that connection, establish a relationship and get a sub into a head space where they want to be loyal and submit more, both financially and in any other appropriate way. 

New arrival in chat ‘seems all the best subs are taken’ - so often quoted. Not true - being owned doesn’t make you the crème de la creme. Unowned subs can be just as amazing . They may not ever want to be Owned and thats fine too. Everyone is here for their own version of fun. You do you!

 So if you want to stable an unowned sub and mould them into all of the things you want them to be from your bio, why not stipulate how YOU can help get them there? What qualities outside of being a dom / god / king, and a picture do you have ? Are you trustworthy ? Do recognise and understand a subs limits? Have you asked about their personal and financial situation? Do they even want to be owned? 

Rome wasn’t built in a day, neither are relationships ; whether that be friendship, sexual or findom - especially if based on all of the things you desire when seeking a genuine, long term , reliable and obedient finsub.

It takes both sides to make a findom connection sustainable , enjoyable , loyal and long term. Please don’t expect a sub to just pluck you out of the crowd and that’s it, you suddenly have this permanent submissive ready to dance to your tune forevermore. 

So often when a relationship works in findom , the sub gets the credit and the praise because they are sending. The truth is , the dom has invested their time and effort into building that connection. They have demonstrated their qualities to the sub and triggered that want and need to serve and sacrifice. And kudos to those doms!

On a separate note- it’s been great to see and read some personal blogs from others that have been sharing their personal stories recently . Keep writing and being you, guys . And good luck with the next chapter in your findom and kink journey .

Cheers , NikeSwitch (Switch being word of the month!)