Behind the Smoke and Mirrors

At this time of year its easy to over indulge in many ways, and let's be honest most of us have at some point as we get caught up in the moment.

And that's fair enough but this time of year in particular can be a very dark and lonely time for people and we need to remember that what we see online is just a persona a smokescreen an individual is behind.

For some it is an escape from stress and a chance to unwind for others it can be a coping mechanism the only way they can find to deal with a real world issue be it a physical issue or something which men in general are famous for not talking about, something in their mental health not being okay.

I know from personal experience how dark this time of year can be. 3 years ago today I received a phone call at work. A phone call NO ONE ever wants to get. To make it worse the Hospital it came from was in a different country to myself. My younger brother had, had a heart attack that morning and had been rushed into Intensive Care but he wasn't going to make it. Even with last minute travel it would still take me 12 hours to get to him I was still 1 hour away when I got the call to say not even the machines had managed to keep him alive.

While this time of year is full of joy spare a moment or two to check in on each other, remember that behind the smoke and mirrors we are all human and can be going through terrible things some quite literally world shattering others not as bad but to the individual can feel just as bad in that moment.

Not everyone is good at reading between the lines and in a community such as this where things can become very intense or even intimate it is even more important that we remember to watch out for each others mental health. A loyal friend suddenly acting out of character can often be a major clue that something is wrong but some people are better at hiding things than others

So forget the nonsense of 'Real men don't cry', ' Emotions make you weak' etc etc and check in on your friends both Sub and Dom over this festive period who knows they may just be needing someone to let them know it's okay to open up and talk about things. After all the loneliest place in the world can be in the middle of a crowd